The Place Beyond the Pines

• 2013
• Crime
• Drama

This is the most impactful and heart-breaking drama I have seen so far in 2013. And, ladies, you get a 2-for-1 deal with Gosling and Cooper so everyone can, and should see this hidden gem of a film. Actually, you must see this.

The Possession

• 2012
• Horror
• Thriller

Only difference with this mundane horror is that the demon isn’t Christian, it’s Jewish. Holy crap, I have nothing remotely interesting to say about this.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

• 2012
• Drama
• Romance

This is one of the most unrealistic high school dramas I have ever seen. This is also one of the best high school dramas I have ever seen. I actually learned something from this. Then came one line towards the end that I didn’t understand. I looked it up and was moved. I good and deep film, yet, painful.

Premium Rush

• 2012
• Action
• Thriller

Is this supposed to be a serious thriller because there is human trafficking, gambling, organized crime, and violence.

OR

Is this some cornball, cat-and-mouse chase, sponsored by Google Maps.

ParaNorman

• 2012
• Adventure
• Animation
• Comedy

Paranorman has a special style that looks vintage, yet modern with its animation. It fuses stop-motion with today’s CG. The story has a great lesson for children and adults will find it liberal, while also reminding grown-ups to be more like kids.

Pitch Perfect

• 2012
• Comedy
• Music
• Romance

You would have every right to expect a Glee movie. What’s unexpected is that the cast is unique, genuine, weird, and all around funny. A surprisingly fun and funny movie.

Project X

• 2012
• Comedy

It’s shit like this that makes me regret being a movie enthusiast sometimes.

Piranha 3DD

• 2012
• Comedy
• Horror
• Thriller

The first one was stupid and fun. This one is stupid and dumb.

However...Ving Rhames.

Prometheus

• 2012
• Action
• Horror
• Sci-fi

People are thinking that this is going to be a direct prequel to Alien. The producers say it’s not completely meant to be but don’t fret because this is absolutely fine as its own stand-alone film. Prometheus is gorgeous right out of the gates, and the escalation of tension is gripping.

The horror aspects are tasteful as there are no cheap scares or unnecessary gore, but don’t dismiss that as tamed either. The story can be deep as many people will be coming up with interesting theories about that universe’s idea of faith, imortality, and the Alien mythos. Yes, there are some loopholes and you can poke holes in the script but not enough for a thumb's down.

Paranormal Activity 3

• 2011
• Horror

Surprise! It's the same shit again!

Puss in Boots

• 2011
• Animation
• Adventure
• Comedy

I'm not a cat person but this film gave me enough laughs to change a bit of that and the "Oooh" cat definitely helped. This was also successful in avoiding all the things that made the last few Shrek films bad.

Puncture

• 2011
• Drama

The real life, court case of safety needles is an important one but not enough to make a drama out of. Chris Evans puts on a good performance and the film tries to honor his character's accomplishments but in the end, it wasn't really worth caring about.

Page Eight

• 2011
• Drama
• Mystery
• Romance

A well-written but boring British drama about politics, spies, and old geezers. The opening is upbeat and Jazzy, which has an opposite tone for the rest of the film. Interesting movie but this isn't something to marvel over and it requires quite a bit of patience.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

• 2011
• Action
• Adventure
• Fantasy

You know they're bad movies. Just keep paying to go see them. Just keep on...

The People vs. George Lucas

• 2010
• Documentary
• Comedy

I'm not a Star Wars fanatic but episodes 4, 5, 6 are damn great movies and I was excited to see 1, 2, and 3. Like everyone else, I hated them so I'm curious to see what his hardcore fans think. This documentary showed me.

George enjoys throwing fresh shit at his fan's faces and his fans keep taking it because the turds are being disguised with bonus/exclusive content but in the end, it's still a turd.

Pitch Black

• 2000
• Action
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

I heard this was good when it came out in 2000. Watching it now, the movie obviously doesn't live up but that's OK, it is an enjoyable Sci-fi thriller. Sure, it has its cheesiness but the film is surprisingly brutal and fun.

Paul

• 2011
• Adventure
• Comedy
• Sci-fi

What a mother-sucking-butt-farting awesome movie! It is funny, well-written, and actually quite touching. Oh, and Kristen Wiig is hilarious in it. Why would you not love this movie?

The Pixar Story

• 2007
• Documentary

I wanted to know more about the company that created hit-after-hit of the most charmingly animated films ever made. Great documentary!

Party Monster: The Shockumentary

• 1998
• Documentary
• Biography

This is the documentary of Micheal Alig. I wanted to watch the real story after watching Party Monster, the movie. There's really nothing special about it unless you're really into (or fascinated by) the queen-type, club culture, with a little murder twist. Parents, show your kids this movie when they're teens and they'll never do drugs.

Party Monster

• 2003
• Biography
• Crime
• Drama

This movie has no qualitative merits, except for the fact that you get to see Macaulay Culkin and Seth Green play flamboyant club kids. Even though Culkin is bad at it. Forget about America's anti-drug program D.A.R.E., just show the kids this movie and they will never smoke drugs.

Paranormal Activity 2

• 2010
• Horror
• Mystery
• Thriller

Here it comes, I'm going to say the most common things about sequels – 'the first one is better.' This is very similar to the first but one thing it lacks (big time) is the creep-factor, which is the main thing that the first one did so well.

The Perfect Host

• 2010
• Thriller

I thought everything was awesome about this until more layers of twists unveil itself towards the end. Things went from tense to crazy and then good to flat-out dumb. It feels like it was originally a short movie and then they wanted to do a full feature so they crammed in a bunch of unnecessary things. I don't recommend this.

Priest

• 2011
• Action
• Horror
• Sci-fi

Have you seen Legion? This movie is just like Legion except it isn't as bad. Don't read too much into that, this still sucks.

Priest of Evil

• 2010
• Crime
• Thriller

Everyone in this movie either has: Old English tattoos, techno hair, G-Star clothing (look it up), Hot Topic jewelry, or biker facial hair. It tries so hard to be hard. I lost all interests after seeing emo boys cut themselves and kids disrespecting their parents in this non-cohesive story line. I know the trailer makes it look like it could be really good but I did not like it.

Precious

• 2009
• Drama

There are a lot of gross things in this film. I didn't like the excessive dream sequences, but good movie!

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

• 2010
• Action
• Adventure
• Fantasy
• Romance

By no means is this a 'must-see', but it definitely is much more underrated than what everyone (including me) thought. It actually ties in well with the game franchise, magnifying it rather than insulting it. There isn't a deep story but it's well-told and it's a fun movie. Great rental for popcorn movie night.

Piranha 3D

• 2010
• Action
• Horror
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

Have you seen Black Sheep? If you have, then this is the aquatic version of it, go watch this now!

If you haven't then you'll like this but only if you turn your brain completely off. Embrace the over-the-top gore and awesome kindergarten dialog and you'll have a blast – and big laughs.

Paper Heart

• 2009
• Comedy
• Romance
• Drama

What a crappy failure at trying to tell a clever love story. It's just boring and so overly awkward that it will put you to sleep, after you exhaust yourself from cringing. No more Charlene Yi, please, no more.

Predators

• 2010
• Action
• Adventure
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

Fans have been complaining about the franchise after the first Predator movie and then came the crap storm that was the Aliens vs. Predators movies. I thought this was balanced between action and suspense while giving the fans what they've been asking for; a Predator movie that doesn't suck, horribly.

The Prestige

• 2006
• Drama
• Mystery
• Thriller

I somehow missed this movie and a big portion of me is glad that I did. I had no idea that it revolved around an insanely-twisted rivalry between two magician friends that went completely off the deep end. I was also floored when I saw David Bowie as Nikola Tesla. It is a "good problem" when you miss a great movie, rediscover it, and purposely avoid watching trailers or reading reviews about it. You, simply, just watch it with a blank and pure mind. Phenomenal film.

The Pianist

• 2002
• Biography
• Drama
• War

This is one of the greatest World War II movies. There's nothing else that needs to be said except that you need to see this if you missed it back in 2002.

Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief

• 2010
• Adventure
• Fantasy

*Yawn, fart, yawn, snore, fart, yawn*

*noises I made through out the whole movie.

The Poughkeepsie Tapes

• 2007
• Crime
• Horror
• Thriller

Icky, nasty, disturbing, serial killer mockumentary! Just look at this poster, is that not enough of a warning sign for you?

Poetic Justice

• 1993
• Drama
• Romance

This crappy film brings back so many good junior high memories.

A Perfect Getaway

• 2009
• Drama
• Horror
• Mystery
• Thriller

Guess who the killers are? You have three vacationing couples to choose from but unfortunately this movie was directed in a way that forces you to pick the obvious candidates while insulting your intelligence. It's a terrible movie so don't even bother renting it unless you are that bored. No, screw that, if you're bored, go fly a kite instead.

Paranormal Activity

• 2009
• Horror
• Mystery
• Thriller

Perfume: The Story of a Murderer

• 2006
• Crime
• Drama
• Thriller

Perfume, I gotta say, is pretty weird. Sometimes in a good way and other times in a bad way. It's about a creepy peasant that is born with a godly sense of smell and ends up murdering people on his search to concoct the perfect scent.

Pandorum

• 2009
• Horror
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

If you enjoyed Event Horizon and didn't expect too much out of it, you'll like this one. On a side note, why the heck was Dennis Quad the lead role in this? All he did was run around, trip over wires, and take a nap. Ben Foster had much more camera time and longer lines. Not to mention he's a better actor (sorry, Dennis).

Push

• 2009
• Action
• Drama
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

...the "off" button.

Public Enemies

• 2009
• Biography
• Crime
• Drama
• History
• Thriller

This isn't a fun shoot-em-up type of movie (if you're expecting that). Instead, it focuses on the relationships and bank robberies of John Dillinger, which can be confusing at times. His men along with other characters come in and out of nowhere and the most meaningful relationship in here was with his gal, which was not focused on enough.

Porky's

• 1982
• Comedy

They should have taken this to the next level (if ya' know what I mean) and called the next sequel "Porking." Get it? Get it?

Pathfinder

• 2007
• Action
• Adventure
• Drama
• History
• Thriller
• War

Vikings vs. Indians? How badass does that sound! Too bad the entire movie could not live up to this idea. I am no director, which makes this more insulting when I say that this movie was horribly directed.

I had no idea what was going on half of the time, especially in the battle sequences. There are so many other bad elements in this movie. I do not recommend this at all, even if you just want to see a action-packed popcorn movie.

Predator 2

• 1990
• Action
• Adventure
• Horror
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

Terrible sequel to the first legendary movie.

P2

• 2007
• Horror
• Thriller

Remember that creepy guy from American Beauty that films plastic bags? He's in this and he brings on the creepiness, ten-fold.

Poltergeist

• 1982
• Horror
• Thriller

A creepy and classic horror icon by Spielberg.

Powder

• 1995
• Drama
• Fantasy
• Mystery
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

Powder just came at the wrong time. If he existed today, everyone would tug him to parties, get him smashed, and have him do whacky tricks with his powers.

Pee-wee's Big Adventure

• 1985
• Adventure
• Family
• Comedy

If you hate this movie then you are a weird creep, just like Pee-Wee. This movie fucking rules!

Postal

• 2007
• Action
• Comedy
• Thriller

This Uwe Boll movie is so bad, it made me upset. I'm not saying that to be witty, I'm telling you that I was genuinely pissed off.

Pleasantville

• 1998
• Fantasy
• Comedy
• Drama

I dig this era so of course I dig this movie. It's about the conservative, good ol' days of America and how everything is black and white, literally. Two teenagers find themselves stuck in a 1950's TV show and their influences begin to change that world.

The Proposal

• 2009
• Comedy
• Drama
• Romance

This image is way funnier than the movie.

A Prophet

• 2009
• Crime
• Drama

A great movie about a young Arab man who is sent to a French prison where he climbs the ranks to kingpin. It's a lot different from your average mafia movie. First off, the main character wasn't even looking to rank-up, but things turned out that way for him. You'll learn how different the French prisons are and how these criminals operate inside and outside of them. In my opinion, this is the best criminal drama of 2009, so far.

The Puppet Masters

• 1994
• Horror
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

Earth is invaded by little slugs that attach themselves onto your neck and control your body. This is a documentary about politicians.

Pet Sematary

• 1989
• Drama
• Fantasy
• Horror
• Thriller

I saw this when I was 9 and it frightened the hell out of me. Remember that ankle scene? I flinched so hard at that.

Philadelphia

• 1993
• Drama

Really good court room drama. Tom Hanks has AIDS and is wrongfully dismissed from his job at a prestigious law firm. Denzel Washington, who is homophobic, represents him.

The Phantom

• 1996
• Action
• Adventure

Grape from the Fruit of The Loom gang goes rogue.

The Plague Dogs

• 1982
• Adventure
• Animation
• Drama

This is a really gritty, adult cartoon about two dogs that escape from a lab and then are hunted down. I definitely do not recommend this if you have a dog or love dogs.

Planet of the Apes

• 2001
• Action
• Adventure
• Sci-fi
• Thriller

Tim Burton brings the original TV series into a full length film. I saw a lot of potential in this movie. There were so many things that wanted to be good but just couldn't for some odd reason. As much as I like Tim Burton, I think someone else would have done a much better job. This was bad.

The Pledge

• 2001
• Drama
• Crime
• Mystery
• Thriller

This film moved me in a very, very negative way. It left me fearful and completely empty. And because of how impactful it was, there's no denying it's a good movie.

Planet B-Boy

• 2007
• Documentary
• History
• Music

This is a good documentary about break dancing and its culture. The movie climaxes with "Battle of the Year," a worldwide tournament that brings all the best crews to Germany.

The Passion of the Christ

• 2004
• Drama

I'm just not going to say anything about this one. It's a hit or miss and it depends solely on your religious background.